I consider myself somewhat of a Star Wars fan. Sure, I haven’t worn a Star Wars costume since I was in kindegarten and my mother dressed my sister and me up as C-3PO and R2D2 for Halloween, but I liked the original three movies. They helped shape my childhood. I even liked The Phantom Menace. Episode II was pretty good, but after seeing Episode III, I take it all back. I want to pretend that I didn’t see any of them. In fact, I refuse to beileive that George Lucas had anything to do with the first three (Episodes IV-VI). I think he had close advisor feeding him all his ideas. Whoever it was should have come back. If you haven’t seen Episode III, Don’t!
They’ll be plenty of people claiming that Lucas finally got it right. They’ll say Darth Vader’s turn to the dark side was perfect. They might even make decent arguments, but they’re wrong. Episode III is bad, real bad. If you never see it, you’ll be better off because of it.
The dialong is stilted and like the rest of the movie just plain bad. From the first words to the unending references of young jedi’s as “younglings”, I kept flinching, trying to dodge the verbal assault being thrown at me, and like everyone else hoping it wouldn’t ruin the movie. Sure, if you can get past the dialogue — Wait, no, the dialog is a fundamental part of any movie. If you have to convince yourself to get past it, it’s either not in your language or bad. This movie had bad dialogue.
Acting & Casting
George Lucas took otherwise good actors and turned them into abominations. Ewan McGregor and even Yoda seemed fake. The beautiful Natalie Portman became unattractive and not due to the pregnancy but because of Lucas’s poor vision. Granted casting problems like Hayden Christensen began in other movies; it came to full light here. George Lucas has made poor decision after poor decision, and the fuition of those bad choices took full effect in Revenge of the Sith. It wasn’t pretty.
The movie was pretty packed with action. The constant fighting was all that moved the otherwise dull movie along. The action could have saved it, if it weren’t so badly done. Lightsaber battles were little more than whilrling blurs of neon light. Any one of the many fights looked exactly like every other one. Even the Emperor’s force duels with Yoda were tedious. No subtly existed. In fact, Lucas would have done well to take note of the final duel in the Samurai Trilogy where only one stroke of the sword was dealt: sometimes more is not good. The blaster fights were incomprehensible jumbles. And the death of the legions of Jedi’s were worse than tragic; they were boring.
While the movies might contain one of the best stories of our generation, it will be hard to find it. Major holes were in the movie’s plot. We all know that Anakin turns evil, but it was supposed to be how that made it interesting. I’m still kind of missing that part. It seems like a simple nightmare was all it took. Characters in this movie die without reason. The plot just tumbles along hoping that what we know about the outcome is enough to patch it together. It isn’t.
I have no doubt that the movie will break many records. Lucas and company will make tons of money, and many will exclaim the Star Wars movie they’d been hoping for. Don’t be fooled. Just watch the movie, and you know deep down that it is bad no matter what amount of flipping and sommersaults the characters pulled off. I give the move a well-deserved 1 out of 5 (disappointement). My only hope is that an aspiring indie-director will rewrite the movies, make them on a shoe-string budget, and give the story the rightful telling that it desrves.